When it comes to building your relationship pillar, you need to also think about romantic relationships. Who you date…
Who you marry…
The dynamics of those interactions…
The ideal partner…
Etc...
Etc...
Etc...
I think you can ponder and think about these things from personal experience…
Or you can learn through observation… Ideally, you can do a bit of both. I try my best to do both. I was a 3rd, 5th, and 7th wheel for a lot of my young adult life. Initially, it wasn’t by choice.
It sucked when your friends were always sucking face and you were the one left out. But it taught me amazing lessons that I’m thankful for. For example, I learned that most men don’t set boundaries. This is a huge mistake. I’ve witnessed so many dudes allow their girlfriends to do whatever they wanted. She'd then guilt the boyfriend for even thinking about doing what he wanted. And finally, after she'd intentionally done something she knew the boyfriend wouldn't like, she'd justify her behavior. It’s almost always a completely lopsided relationship. And almost always, despite the boyfriend’s patience and best effort… The girlfriend almost always cheats or leaves him. And then he’s all alone. I knew exactly why.
He didn’t set boundaries because he was too afraid to lose the girl. And his fear of loss became a self-fulfilling prophecy. Personally, I believe that as a man, you should never fear losing anyone, especially not a girl.
Girls will be mad at me for saying this, but I need to be pro-guy (especially in this era)...
And I need to point something out to guys that they probably haven’t realized (until now).
There are girls everywhere.
Literally.
I’m not saying that some girls aren’t cooler or a better fit for you than others. But what I am saying is that there are effectively infinite girls to choose from. Drop the mindset that there’s only one. It’s holding you back.
Set boundaries for yourself. I guarantee she has some for herself--as she should. Why not use the same playbook and do the same thing?
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